The Things I learned From Juniper Crescent, Part 2

Okay, time for part 2 on stuff Tony learned while writing Juniper Crescent.

I learned a lot about catnip getting this book together. A lot of you are thinking that I sat and watched cats getting stoned until I fell unconscious, but I like to get involved in my research.

Okay, I did watch cats getting stoned, and it was hilarious.

But I did more than that. I actually bought some catnip and tried various ways of getting it into my system. A lot of it did nothing, or tasted bad, or just plain felt weird. Here’s some of my experimentation:

1. huffing: I did get light-headed, but my roommate said that was likely because I was losing oxygen to my brain, not necessarily as a result of the catnip.

2. tea: I cut catnip in with my usual sleepy time tea. No effect whatsoever.

3. eating: I now know what a lawnmower feels like.

4. Patch on the bottom of the foot: I don’t know where I got this idea, but someone suggested that the bottom of the foot has a marvelous ability to soak up stuff. So I made a poultice. It felt awkward and that was about it.

5. smoking it: It’s a cousin to marijuana, right? Nope. No dice. It’s a distant enough cousin that all I did was feel stupid.

So, then I went back to watching cats go at it.


I also found this website very useful. It’s been updated since I wrote Juniper Crescent, but it’s the same site that Oksanya looks up when she’s doing her own research before she gave it a try.

Another thing I learned is that people are fairly extreme no matter what they have.

One time I was talking about Juniper Crescent, trying to drum up some interest so I could have a bit of a crowd when I did an event at a library, and a woman nearly berated me out of the building. Why? She didn’t listen to that first sentence that said it was my debut novel and a work of fiction. She honestly thought I was talking about an operation that could infuse human genes with animal genetics.

Needless to say, she didn’t come to the open house. Not even Jones Soda could entice her.

But, even without the operation, people are still finding ways to make themselves more unique, more iconic, and in their eyes, more than human. Here’s a list of what I’m talking about. There’s also this guy. Throw in the real life Barbie, real life Superman, and even the twin who had his arm amputated and stitched under his twin’s arm, and the Isis Operation looks downright natural by comparison.

Even those extreme cases, though, are a thread in a tapestry that will have me intrigued for the rest of my life. Everyone’s looking to be remembered. The vast majority of people want to be someone unique, do something legendary, accomplish something that seals their name in the tomes of history forever. We take a look at what we define as mediocrity and know it can’t be for us. We’re destined for something greater. Then, when we look at what it takes to be someone memorable in today’s world, it becomes easy to settle on mediocrity. But there’s still that dream of being famous, right? Just right there, waiting for us to have a spare moment to think about it.

Note: Please do not take the ideas suggested in this video as a means of becoming famous. Try to be more “Overly Attached Girlfriend” famous.


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