I’m writing this to all the people who followed me to explain my absence on the blog for
the past few months. I wish I could say that I’ve got some really cool reason as to why I
haven’t been posting, but life got busy. Between work and not wanting to be at work, I’ve
just gotten lazy, and that’s not right, especially when I’ve been such a proponent of not
being lazy and going and doing those things that make us happy.
But, I’m on now because I’m stuck. On one side, I’ve got the whole reason I started my
blog: my writing. I haven’t really done anything with it since I started working full time.
I’m at a higher stress job than usual, so I haven’t been doing a lot. I’ve really only been
working on my writing when I’m too bored to do anything else.
It doesn’t happened very often, even though I do have spare time. Heck, I’m regularly
trolling Imgur and playing my 3DS, why can’t I just give that time to writing? I could
have all the books I’ve planned on writing already completed.
I’ve got two novels out, Juniper Crescent and Hallow Terrace, but they’ve both been out
for a few years now and I have no clue how to market them. I thought I did when I first
started in the published world, but now it seems that no matter what I do, it’s fighting an
uphill battle with both hands tied behind my back. I felt so much satisfaction with my
writing. There was a sense of validation and accomplishment holding the first copies in
my hand. Now I feel like I’ve lost it and I don’t know how to get it back.
On the other hand, however, is giving up. Letting the publisher cancel my contract with
them and dispose of all remaining inventory written by myself. I’d be able to focus more
fully on de-stressing when I’m not at work. I know it’s the lazy way out. The internet’s
full of inspirational crap telling me not to give up, that success is just around the corner,
that I just need to keep working. So how long am I supposed to keep trying? I’ve got a
garden, two cats, a more than full-time career, a myriad of projects I’m trying to
complete. How far derailed can I get before the train just crashes and burns? Is it always a
bad thing to let a dream go?
My biggest concern with giving up is that I’ll be wasting so many opportunities. Sarah
Book Publishing took a chance on me, and if I just quit then I’m spitting in their face.
I’ve had the dream of being published in my hands and I couldn’t follow through. It’s just
But is it reality?
Any suggestions you have would be greatly appreciated.